Tuesday, September 26, 2006

George Bush and "Shim Theory"

Yesterday, George W. Bush met with business leaders of the Lebanon Private Sector Initiative (LBSI) in the Oval Office to discuss business and democracy.

The leaders included CEO John Chambers of Cisco Systems, Craig Barret of Intel Corp., CEO Ray Irani of Occidental Petroleum Corp.

President Bush stated during the meeting: "Our goal, and our mission, is to help Lebanese citizens and Lebanese businesses not only recover, but to flourish, because we believe strongly in the concept of a democracy in Lebanon." He also said: "May God bless the good people of Lebanon."

I, Paul M. Sark, whose life is strikingly similar to that of George W. Bush recently said something very similar to my wife. Last night in fact. I said: "America's goal and mission is to help Lebanese citizens and Lebanese businesses not only recover, but flourish because Me & George W. believe strongly in business in Lebanon as the first step to a real democracy. Selfless American businessmen want nothing more than to help establish a beach head for business and promote democracy."

My wife, who tends to be non-committal when it comes to politics thought it sounded like a good idea. "That's great, honey," she said. "Can you help me shim up the bookcase in the living room? It's a little tippy since we rearranged the furniture over the weekend."

A lightbulb went on in my head. I snapped my fingers in delight and said: "In a way, that's what Me & George W. do to promote democracy -- rearrange a country's furniture to get better circulation, better circulation of people and money and democracy!" I went to the desk and made a note of this revelation.

While I was writing down "Furniture, Circulation, Money, Democracy" my wife asked: "Isn't what George W. does more like rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic?"

"In a way, yes," I agreed. "Except that when people like Me & George W. rearrange the furniture on deck, we also rearrange things in the engine room. And once we get that engine room humming, countries like Lebanon are able to avoid economic icebergs and sail safely into the welcoming harbor of global capitalism."

"Can you help me now do you think?" my wife asked. "This bookcase is really tippy."

I took the shims from my wife, leaned into the bookcase and stuck two shims under the bottom right corner. Standing up, I took satisfaction in my work.

"Sometimes all a country needs is a one shim, but sometimes two," I said. "Some shims need to be really big. But as the largest economy in the world we are happy to shim up countries like Lebanon so that they can stand up proudly and participate in global democracy."

"It's still a little tippy," my wife said, rocking the bookcase forward and backward. "Maybe we need another one?"

"Me & George W. have plenty of shims," I agreed. "And so does Cisco, Intel and Occidental Petroleum."

"Why don't you go work on your deck chair ideas now," my wife suggested, holding out her hand for the shims. "I'll take care of this."

"It's all about shimming and cooperation," I said, my brain firing on all cylinders. "Thanks, honey, for all the great ideas."

I worked on my shim ideas until dinner and got it to the point where I think I have a new business model for the United States and the rest of the world. You've heard of String Theory? Well, let me tell you, that's nothing compared to Shim Theory!

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Saturday, September 23, 2006

Bush's Black Dog -- and Mine, Too!

In another startling similarity between myself and the president of the United States, Me & George W. both own black dogs!

Now, without going to the White House website, can you tell which one is George W.'s black dog and which one's mine?

Ready? Guess...right...NOW!


Now click here to get the answer.

Were you right? If so, please leave a comment about how it feels to be right. Know that if you are right, you've won the feeling of satisfaction that comes with being right. And in that self-satisfaction you are feeling something of how it feels to be Me & George W.

If you were wrong, put your tail between your legs and skulk slowly away. Me & George W. can't stand losers. And neither can the American people!

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Thursday, September 21, 2006

Bush Calls Chavez "El Diablo" -- And So Do I!

Hugo Chavez, the dangerouly unstable ultra-leftist president of Venezuela, called George W. Bush "the devil" in his speech at the U.N. yesterday.

In an interesting inversion, I, Paul M. Sark, whose life is amazingly similar to George W. Bush's, yesterday called Hugo Chavez "El Diablo."

Because my life is similar to George Bush's, I suspect George W. called Chavez "El Diablo," too. Unlike Chavez however, I'm sure George W. only called Chavez "El Diablo" in his own mind and never said it out loud. Because George W. is a true gentleman and statesman.

I, on the other hand, called Chavez "El Diablo" out loud to the gang at McCann's Lounge. (While my life is similar to George W.'s, they are not exactly the same.)

I began my name calling speech to my colleagues at McCann's by noting that Chavez had been at the U.N. that day. Then I said: "El Diablo came to the U.N. Here in New York. Right here. And it smells of sulphorous Venezuelan farts all over New York now." I then grasped my nose my right with thumb and forefinger and pretended to gasp for breath.

Later at home, I said to my wife: "The president of the Venezuela should go before an international tribunal." I then compared the Chavez administration's actions to those of the Nazis.

Interestingly, I read later that Hugo Chavez said almost the same things I said about him that he said about George W. So I guess in addtion to being El Diablo, Chavez is a copycat, too!

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Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Bush at U.N. -- Spreading the Spore of Freedom!

President Bush, speaking at the U.N. yesterday, made another speech about how people are making the choice for freedom the world over.

President Bush's speech was remarkably similar to remarks I, Paul M. Sark, made to my liberal sister-in-law, Ginger, last night when she called on the phone to speak to my wife.

See if you don't agree!

THE PRESIDENT: Freedom, by its nature, cannot be imposed -- it must be chosen. From Beirut to Baghdad, people are making the choice for freedom. And the nations gathered in this chamber must make a choice, as well: Will we support the moderates and reformers who are working for change across the Middle East -- or will we yield the future to the terrorists and extremists? America has made its choice: We will stand with the moderates and reformers.

Now read what I said to Ginger:

PAUL M. SARK: Freedom, by its nature, cannot be imposed -- it must grow from the freedom spores that we have been dropping the world over. From Beirut to Baghdad, people must plant the freedom spores we give them. We'll help for awhile, but the nations gathered in this chamber must make a choice, as well: Will we support the Middle Eastern moderates and reformers who accept the freedom spore -- or will we let the killers, murderers, terrorists, extremists and other bad gardeners uproot the tender green shoots of freedom? America has made its choice: We will stand with the tender young shoots.

LIBERAL SISTER-IN-LAW, GINGER: Spores? Shoots? Freedom? You make it all sound like some biology class.

PAUL M. SARK: Freedom is natural and so is biology. People in the Middle East need to listen to their God-given bodies and let the freedom happen.

LIBERAL SISTER-IN-LAW, GINGER: Are we talking orgies here, Paul?

PAUL M. SARK: Of course you liberals always turn everything into a question about sex. You prefer the profane to the sacred. The condom to the cross. You prefer bicycles to cars and walking to riding. Tell me this, if dogs could drive, wouldn't they drive?

LIBERAL SISTER-IN-LAW: Are you asking me if dogs would choose to wear condoms and crosses and drive cars? Let me talk to your wife. I haven't got time for this.

Ginger always gives up and asks to speak to my wife when she doesn't want to admit that I'm right.



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Monday, September 18, 2006

NYC Police Grant U.N. Protest Permit to Rabble

The New York City Police have given the green light to a radical left-wing fringe organization, United for Peace and Justice, to protest the War on Terror in front of the United Nations in New York tomorrow during George Bush's speech.

According to many well-informed colleagues of mine at McCann's Lounge, the radical protesters plan to burn flags, perform abortions, and recite the Pledge of Allegiance without mentioning God. They also plan to cricitize George W. Bush's policy in Iraq.

As a man whose life is strikingly similar to George W. Bush's, I am not surprised that the New York City Police Department knuckled under to the demands of the protest organizers.

Heavily unionized, the NYPD are closet socialists. In cahoots with other socialist organizations the world over, "New York's Finest" have an agenda that is very similar to the left-wing protestors.

That agenda includes universal health insurance and overtime pay, two socialistic practices embraced by Communists, Nazis, Islamofacists and most UN member nations.

Me & George W. have a lot of respect for the "thin blue line" that polices the boundaries between civilzation and Islamofacist anarchy. But we also know that soon a line must drawn against police unions, too.

Coercive and inefficient, unions exploit their members. Not only that, but union bosses are criminals and crooks. They do not have the best interests of their members at heart. Not like employers do. Employers care deeply about their employees. After all, they employ them!

Has a union ever created a business? No. Unions have only destroyed businesses. Unions are parasitic on the entreprenurial spirit of heroic entreprenuers.

If the NYPD can ever throw off its union shackles, New York will be a much safer city. Illegal protests will become a thing of the past.

And Me & George W. will be a lot happier!

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Saturday, September 16, 2006

Bush Accuses Powell of "Flawed Logic" on Torture Policy -- Sark Agrees

President Bush, looking trim, fit and focused, spoke with purposeful passion at a White House Rose Garden press conference, where he called "unacceptable" and premised on "flawed logic" Colin Powell's statement that the world is beginning to doubt the moral basis of America's fight against terrorism.

President Bush's response to the impertinent liberal views of Colin Powell were strikingly similar to remarks I, Paul M. Sark, made to my liberal sister-in-law, Ginger last night at dinner.

See if you don't agree!

QUESTION FROM TERRY, LIBERAL REPORTER (White House, Rose Garden): Mr. President, former Secretary of State Colin Powell says the world is beginning to doubt the moral basis of our fight against terrorism. If a former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff and former Secretary of State feels this way, don't you think that Americans and the rest of the world are beginning to wonder whether you're following a flawed strategy?

THE PRESIDENT: If there's any comparison between the compassion and decency of the American people and the terrorist tactics of extremists, it's flawed logic. I simply can't accept that. It's unacceptable to think that there's any kind of comparison between the behavior of the United States of America and the action of Islamic extremists who kill innocent women and children to achieve an objective, Terry.

Now read Ginger's question and my response:

QUESTION FROM, GINGER, LIBERAL SISTER-IN-LAW TO PAUL M. SARK (Backyard, Sark House): If a guy who was the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs thinks the Geneva Conventions are fine the way they are, doesn't that mean something? Doesn't it mean that most people know that Bush and his cabal need to be stopped before they totally fuck up America and the world?

PAUL M. SARK: How can you compare the American people to terrorists? I don't see how the American people, especially American women and children, could ever be accused of torturing terrorists and Islamic extremists. It's unacceptable to think that there's any kind of comparison between women and children in America and the actions of Islamic extremist women and children who kill to achieve an objective, Ginger.

LIBERAL SISTER-IN-LAW, GINGER: What? What kind of crazy-ass logic is that, Paul? Torture is torture no matter who does it. And if we're thought of as a nation that endorses torture, then we have no moral standing. And we used to have some moral standing in the world. Truth, justice and the American Way, remember?

PAUL M. SARK: Next question, please. Let's see. How about you, Don?

LIBERAL SISTER-IN-LAW, GINGER: I'm waiting for my answer, Paul.

PAUL M. SARK: Who are you? Helen Thomas? You had your turn. Let my brother Don here ask me a question.

LIBERAL SISTER-IN-LAW: Just make sure you "stay on message," Sark, because if you ever go off message, you might actually have an original thought of your very own. And then you'd have to kill yourself.

At that point, I took a question from Don about when I thought the Mets would clinch the pennant.

Ginger got up and went to the bathroom where she probably had a nice little liberal cry all by herself, liberally wallowing in the "injustice of it all." Sentimental bleeding-heart liberals like Clinton love to cry. When they're not crying they're copulating.

Liberals will never admit it, but it was liberal crying and copulating that killed 3,000 people on 9/11 and which made torturing terrorists necessary and acceptable.

'Nuff said!


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Friday, September 15, 2006

Seeking to Perpetuate Bush Policy, Sark Still Considering Presidential Run in 2008

I, Paul M. Sark, whose life is strikingly similar to the life of George W. Bush, am still considering a run for the presidency in 2008.

As I noted in a previous entry, it is clear to me our nation and the world needs at least another four years of Bushian leadership -- preferably another eight years. Since George W. can't run again, that leaves me.

Who else but Me & George W. listen to our guts and hearts the way we do? And have such similar hearts and guts? Who else has the courage to be the Decider on all matters related to civilization, Western and Eastern? Who else listens to our Father -- who art in Heaven, not the one in Kennebunkport or Syracuse -- and who know that He has absolute faith in Our faith in Him? And that Our faith in His faith in Us is based absolutely on His faith in Us in Him. Amen!

I suppose Dick Cheney could run. But unless God steps in and fixes that bum ticker of Dick's that's a non-starter. Of course, unless He steps in and fixes Dick's ticker, or breathes the breath of life into him after his ticker stops ticking. Let me say, unequivocally, that if Dick Cheney is resurrected by God, I will humbly stop aside and let Dick pursue the presidency. After all, me and Cheney are drinking buddies!


There's Don Rumsfeld, another drinking buddy of mine, who would also make a great president. But I don't think America is prepared for someone of such awesome intellectual power.

The American people like their presidents to be just plain folks, like Me & George W.. They like the kind of president who they can see themselves having a beer and watching the game with. Even though George W. doesn't drink beer anymore, he and I are fond of bourbon, and I think that will work for the people of America.

So I continue to think it's a good idea my running for president. What do you think, my fellow Americans?

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Thursday, September 14, 2006

Bush Sees "Third Awakening" of Religious Devotion in U.S.

According to the Washington Post, "President Bush said yesterday that he senses a ‘Third Awakening’ of religious devotion in the United States that has coincided with the nation’s struggle with international terrorists, a war that he depicted as ‘a confrontation between good and evil.’"

The Post went to report that "Bush told a group of conservative journalists that he notices more open expressions of faith among people he meets during his travels, and he suggested that might signal a broader revival similar to other religious movements in history."

I, Paul M. Sark, whose life is amazingly similar to George W. Bush's, have, perhaps not surprisingly noticed signs of a Third Great Awakening, too! Here's an excerpt from a speech I made to my friends and supporters at McCann's Lounge just the other day:

PAUL M. SARK: "I don't know about you fellows, but I sense in these great United States a new quickening of the spirit, a new willingness to believe that an ancient evil is abroad in the form of a new generation of mustached men in Araby."

"In my travels up and down the aisles of my church, in my listenings to Sunday morning radio and TV preachers, I have noticed more open expressions of faith than ever before. This gladdens my heart. It maketh me to like down in green pastures and see in the shapes of the clouds, puffy crosses, crowns of thorns, terrible swift swords, and other paraphernalia of God's mercy and goodness."

"Liberals think you can 'negotiate' with Satan. But the American people know there is no appeasing the Devil. To burst through the Gates of Hell and exterminate the 'Great Satan' we must be resolute, yea, even unto the Final Days, even until our president, George W. Bush and I, Paul M. Sark, at the side of Jesus Christ Himself at last harrow the hellish Middle East and bring forth upon this earth His heavenly realm of revelation and glory."


It's funny, but even now, after lo these many months where I have reported on the similarities between Me & George W., I am struck by how similar the similarities between us truly are!

So, may God Bless Me & George W.! And all Americans of faith who have awakened to the evil presence of Satan and the Liberals!

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Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Sark Considers Presidential Run in 2008

I, Paul M. Sark, whose life is amazingly similar to the life of George W. Bush, am considering a run for the presidency in 2008.

I am considering running for president because it is becoming more and more clear to me that America and the world needs at least another four years of Bushian leadership -- preferably another eight years.

Without the strong leadership of George W. Bush or me, the global War on Terror and the fight for civilization will not be as proactively prosecuted as it has been. We will definitely wind up fighting them over here, instead of over there -- especially if a liberal is elected. There's even a good chance of it happening with a moderate Republican!

I don't know about you, my fellow Americans, but I sure don't want to have to fight them over here. As President Bush said recently, "War is not a time of joy." This is the kind of sound insight we have come to expect from President Bush, and the kind of insight I hope to provide, too! If I decide to run, that is, an option which I'm finding more and more compelling the more I think about it.

So I think it's a good idea. What do you think, my fellow Americans?

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Saturday, September 09, 2006

Bush Smells Lies, Mendacity in "Path to 9/11" Docudrama

Today, George W. Bush blasted the controversial ABC miniseries "Path to 9/11" calling it "grossly inaccurate," "biased and misleading," and "just plain wrong." He also called it "mendacious."

President Bush's remarks, made to wife Laura Bush, came after the couple watched a preview copy of "Path to 9/11" in the Chief Executive bedchamber on Air Force One. The Presidential Couple were flying back to Washington, D.C. from Atlanta where Bush delivered a speech recalling how he was right about how the war against terrorism would take a long time.

Their conversation, based on a report in which some characters were composites, and some scenes were made up, went something like this:

"What do you mean, mendacious," asked Laura soothingly, sensing her husband's temper heating up. "What do you mean, grossly inaccurate?"

George W. grunted and sat up in bed. "Saddam: we had 'em," George W. replied, eyes flashing. "But Big Daddy let 'em go."

"Now don't you go talking about Big Daddy Bush like that," Laura said nervously, clutching her nightgown up around her throat.

George W. snorted, got up from the bed and began pacing. "Big Daddy thinks he's the only one can smell mendacity. Well, I tell you, girl, I'm sick of it! I'm sick of him and Colin Powell. And the damn U.N. . They don't give me credit for what I done. What they wasn't man enough to do! And neither does this damn movie!"

"Come back to bed, sugar," Laura whispered, patting the blanket. "Come and give me some of the mandacity -- if you know what I mean."

"That Saddam tried to kill my Daddy," George W. fairly spat. "But does that damn movie show that? No! Do they show that Saddam plottin' 'gainst Big Daddy? No, suh!"

"It's just a movie, Georgie Dub," Laura pleaded. "Let it go. Come on here to me and we can both let it go."

George W. glared at Laura, his eyes hard, tight and mean. "I did let it go. And I done it to stop the Islamofacism. Not like Big Daddy. I ain't no appeaser!"

"Shut your mouth, George W." Laura said, her eyes wide with shock.

"'Peasin' the U.N.! 'Peasin' Colin Powell! Took a man like George W. here to go and clean up that Islamomess in Iraq. Took a real man like George W. here to spread universal freedom. Took a real man like George W. here to bomb the ever-lovin' crap outa that Islamofacist craphole of a country! Big Daddy weren't never hard enough." George W. stopped and stared at Laura. "'Ceptin maybe with you."

"Georgie, no!" Laura said, pleading, her eyes filling with tears. "Nothin' ever happened between Big Daddy and me. How many times do I have to say that? How many times?"

"How 'bout you and Colin Powell," George W. sneered. "You ain't gonna deny that happened, are you?"

Laura moaned into her cupped hands and shook her head. "You know I never slept with anyone but you, George W.," she said softly.

"Why'd you have him in the bedroom, then, woman?" George W. roared. "And don't you tell me again you called him in to bust up no chiffarobe!"

Just then the intercom by the bed flashed and buzzed, the digital screen showing the cell phone number of Karl Rove.

George W. slapped the button. "Dammit, Karl," George W. shouted. "You know you can't use a cellphone on Air Force One. You want Osama and al Queda listenin' in?"

Rove's voice drifted lazily from the speaker. "So what did you think of the movie? Good, right?"

"Where's the part where I tell off Big Daddy!" shouted George W. "You said you'd get it in there! Where is it, Turd Blossom?"

"Please don't call him that, Georgie," whispered Laura from the bed. "It's not dignified."

"Hey, Turd Blossom," George W. said caustically, turning to glare at his wife. "You shut down that cell phone right now or I'll be siccin' your ol' Islamosadist boyfriend on you again!"

The intercom clicked, the light flickered off.

"Heh, heh, heh," chuckled George W. Then turning to his wife he said, "I ain't done with you yet, woman, so don't you go thinkin' I am."

***********************************************


This exchange between George W. Bush, Laura Bush, and Karl Rove was recovered in January, 2006 by the CIA from the laptop of an al Queda terrorist, Ahman al Muhummadan. Muhammadan had sold the television rights to the story CBS in 2005, for which he was paid $10 million dollars.

Because of the determined efforts of Karl Rove and Paul Mellon Scaife, however, CBS cancelled the production before filming could begin.

***********************************************

How do I know this? How do I, Paul M. Sark, a man whose life is remarkably similar to that of George W. Bush's know this?

Because.



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Bush Speech More Forceful Than Usual

Yesterday in Atlanta President Bush talked forcefully about all the good things he has done to make America and the world better and safer in the past 5 years since 9/11.

Read this snippet from that forceful speech which, although I didn't see it, was, I'm sure, delivered forcefully, probably even more forcefully than usual. I mean, I can just tell because my life and the life of George W. are remarkably similar. See if you don't agree about the forcefulness:

"In the early days after 9/11, I told the American people that this would be a long war -- a war that would look different from others we have fought, with difficulties and setbacks along the way. The past five years have proven that to be true. The past five years have also shown what we can achieve when our nation acts with confidence and resolve and clear purpose."


Forceful, right?

I delivered a similarly forceful speech at dinner last night to my sister-in-law, Ginger. Regular readers of this blog know that Ginger is a liberal. Anyway, read what I said and see if you don't think my speech was almost as forceful as George W.'s, and more forceful than my usual speeches to Ginger.


"In the early days after 9/11, I told you that this would be a long war with difficulties and setbacks. Now I'm not saying 'I told you so' -- but I told you so! The past five years have shown what we can achieve when our nation acts with confidence and resolve and clear purpose. But if you liberals had been running things, well, you would have reacted with nervousness and fickleness and blowjobs and cigars in the Oval office -- anything to try and calm yourselves down!"

As you might have guessed, my forceful speech left everyone at the table, but especially Ginger, astounded. No surprise there -- Me & George W. do that a lot and we're used to it.

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Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Bush Reminds World US Does Not Torture -- And So Do I!

Today, President Bush reminded the world that the U.S. does not torture, a special reminder he made for forgetful people the world over.

In a related story, I, Paul M. Sark, whose life is remarkably similar to George W. Bush's, reminded some people in my office that the US does not torture people, too!

Read what George W. said, then what I said and see if you don't agree we made very similar remarks.

"I want to be absolutely clear with our people, and the world: The United States does not torture. It's against our laws, and it's against our values. I have not authorized it -- and I will not authorize it."





"I want to be absolutely clear with you people, and the world: The United States does not torture. It's against our laws, and it's against our values. I have not authorized it -- and George W. Bush will not authorize it."


Me & George W. have had to repeat this a lot over the past year. But we're not complaining. A lot of people just don't pay a lot of attention to the news.

But a well-informed citizenry is essential to a democracy. I think Thomas Jefferson said that. Or maybe George W.

Whoever said it, it's a good idea.

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Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Bush Reminds Americans U.S. Is At War -- Sark Does Same!

Today, President Bush took time out of his busy schedule to remind Americans that the US is still at war.

In a related story, I, Paul M. Sark, reminded some Americans in my office that the US is still at war, too. What's particularly remarkable is that both Me & George W. made very similar reminders.

Read what George W. said, then what I said and see if you don't agree!

"Bin laden and his terrorist's allies have made their intentions as clear as Lenin and Hitler before them," the president said before the Military Officers Association of America and diplomatic representatives other countries that have suffered terrorist attacks. "The question is `Will we listen? Will we pay attention to what these evil men say?'"



"Bin laden and his terrorist's allies have made their intentions as clear as Lenin and Hitler and Hirohito and Mussolini and Noriega and Mossadegh and Queen Liliuokalani and Zelaya and the Spanish Empire and Ho Chi Minh and Sitting Bull before them," I, Paul M. Sark said before lunch to some co-workers in my office. "The question is `Will we listen? Will we pay attention to what these evil men and women say?'"

Busy man that he is, President Bush probably didn't have enough time to mention the other evil men and women that I was able to.

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President Bush Extols Work on Labor Day -- And So Do I!

Yesterday, Labor Day, President Bush honored the American work force at the Paul Haul Center for Maritime Training and Education in Piney Point, Maryland.

His remarks to the students there were remarkably similar to remarks that I made yesterday to a janitor, Miguel, who was sweeping up the front steps of PS 321 in Brooklyn, New York. But then, Me & George W. lead remarkably similar lives.

Read what President Bush said, then read what I said and see if you don't agree!


PRESIDENT BUSH (to students at Paul Haul Center for Maritime Training): Today, on Labor Day, we honor those who work, and we honor those who work because, in so doing, we recognize that one of the reasons why we're the economic leader in the world is because of our work force.


Now here's what I said:

PAUL M. SARK (to janitor, Miguel, in front of PS 321): Today, on Labor Day, we honor those who work, and we honor those who work because, in your working, we all work to become the economic leader in the world because of our work force.



You probably noticed that I threw in a few more "works" than President Bush did. That's because Me & George W. know that people who work for a living sometimes need to have things repeated over and over again until they get it. Like how we're going to "stay the course in Iraq" no matter whether we're calling our enemies terrorists or Islamo-facists.

The janitor, Miguel, who I was talking to seemed to agree with what I was saying. He kept saying "No? Say!! No? Say!! over and over again. So I said: "Yes! I do say, Miguel!" until I was sure he got it.


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Friday, September 01, 2006

Bush vs. Defeatocrats?

The Republican National Committee's website is finally saying what Me & George W. have been saying for a long time now: Democrats are defeatists. And because they are defeatists they are aiding and abetting the Islamo-Fascist Commie Totalitarian Terrorists and sowing moral confusion among the American people.

Though they are little bit late to this issue, the RNC have coined a bold new name for the Democrat defeatists. The RNC is calling them "Defeatocrats."

This is just the kind of hard-hitting, fact-based name-calling in which Republicans like Me & George W. excel. It's a perfect example of how Repbulicans can boil complex ideas down into simple ideas. Try and find a Democrat -- I mean Defeatocrat -- who can do that!

Read these two quotes from well-known Defeatocrats. Not only are they flat wrong about Iraq being worse now that it was, you'll see what I mean about Defeatocrats inability to come up with anything catchy. (You can see these quotes and others if you go to the RNC website.)
Defeatocrats Say Iraq Is Worse Because Of "Presence" Of American Troops:

Rep. John Murtha (D-PA): "[Iraq is] worse today than it was six months ago when I spoke out initially. ... It's getting worse." (NBC's "Meet The Press," 6/18/06)

Senate Minority Leader Reid (D-NV): "I truly believe that the problem in Iraq is our policies. It's our presence that's also a problem. We're an occupying force ..." (Mort Kondracke, Op-Ed, "Democrats Look Weak Calling For Iraq 'Exit,'" Roll Call, 2/3/05)

If they had any brains, Howard Dean and his gang at the DNC could come up with something catchy like "Defeatocrat" or "Cut and Run Liberal." But, being liberals they don't have any brains.

I've actually got a couple of names the Defeatocrats could use on Republicans. Not that I'm going to put those ideas on my blog, of course!

That would make me a terrorist because I would be aiding and abetting the Defeatocrats who are actually terrorists because they are aiding and abetting the terrorists.

And I am not a terrorist! Far from it -- I am a Repatriotpublican!

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