Showing posts with label Iraq. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Iraq. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Bush Nostalgic for "Stay the Course" -- And So Am I!


I don't know about you, but Me & George W. are nostalgic for the good old days when we were completely psyched about the whole "stay the course" thing in Iraq.

I mean it's really disappointing that the Iraqi people stopped cooperating on the stay the course plan. I suppose they're doing the best they can. What with all the terrorists always pushing them off course, you can understand how it's hard to stay on the course.

It's funny but I was thinking about this the other day when I was riding on the subway and I missed my stop. See, I was reading the new book by Bill O'Reilly, that great culture warrior. In fact the book is called "Culture Warrior." Anyway, I wound up at the Parkside station -- two stops past mine! I got out, walked over the overpass and waited for a Q train going back.

It was while I was waiting that I thought, "It's just like those Iraqis in a way. They stayed the course too long and weren't reacting to the situation on the ground and now they can't stay the course because they waited too long to react. And now it's hard to react because everything is falling apart."

Then I thought of how disappointed George W. probably is in the Iraqi people. I mean I assume that he thinks, like I think, because we're so similar Me & George W. are, that the Iraqi people really squandered the golden opportunity of freedom that America bestowed upon them.

I thought: "It's a shame that Iraqi renewal is going to take a lot longer than we had planned."

Then the Q train showed up and I went home, making sure to watch the stations carefully so I wouldn't miss my stop again!

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Jean-Paul Sark Interrogates Paul M. Sark

Imagine how angry I was when I received an insulting email from a Frenchman. A Frenchman!

Mr. Jean-Paul Sark, as you'll see, has the audacity to suggest the "stamp of my existence" has disappeared because the Democrats took over the Congress! I ask you: who but a Frenchman could write such confused quasi-philosophic drivel?


Read Jean-Paul Sark's email and you'll see why nearly everyone, but especially Me & George W., hate the French!

From: Jean-Paul Sark
Date: Nov 18, 2006 3:09 PM
Subject: Mr. Sark -- Are You Suffering from Nausea?
To: paulmsark@gmail.com

Dear Mr. Sark,

Just today, I came across your blog, Me & George W., which has made me nauseous in the extreme. Allow me to explain.

You see, my name is Jean-Paul Sark. I am a dejected researcher in Le Havre, France. I have become starkly conscious of the fact that inanimate objects and situations remain absolutely indifferent to my existence. They show themselves to be resistant to whatever significance human consciousness might perceive in them.

This indifference of "things in themselves" has the effect of highlighting the freedom I have to perceive and act in the world; everywhere I look I find situations imbued with meanings which bear the stamp of my existence. Everything I encounter in my everyday life is suffused with a pervasive, even horrible, taste -- specifically, my freedom.

I write to you today wondering if you, with your remarkable similarity to George W. Bush, see everywhere you look situations without meaning, situations which do not bear the stamp of your existence. I wonder this because in the wake of the mid-term election it seems George W. Bush's version of reality has been rejected by the American electorate. Thus, nothing bears the stamp of his existence any longer. In turn, nothing bears the stamp of your existence anymore either.

Do you have a horrible taste in your mouth, i.e., the taste of freedom? Are you feeling "Being or Nothingness?" Or both?

By the way, I should probably mention that we have similar last names. But that is so obvious as to be puerile. But since you specialize in the puerile, perhaps you will find it amusing. That is entirely your responsibility.

Sincerely,
Jean-Paul Sark

Le Havre, France

Me & George W. are not real big fans of the French. As you recall, the French ambassador said some really stupid things about not invading Iraq before we Americans did our duty to mankind and invaded that country and captured the tyrant, Saddam Hussein.

So, my answer is a definite, American "No" to you Mr. Jean-Paul Sark. My mouth tastes fine. Because the freedom I taste is American freedom. It's a sweet and satisfying taste. The complete opposite of the the cheese-eating taste in your surrender monkey mouth, you cheese-eating surrender monkey!

Au revoir!