Reports of Al-Zarqawi's Death Greatly Exaggerated

According to a well-placed source, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, the mastermind behind hundreds of bombings, kidnappings and beheadings in Iraq, was spotted walking the streets in New York's hip Chelsea district wearing cutoff jeans.

The semi-confidential source spotted him with his boyfriend. Recognizing al-Zarqawi's legs, the source immediately contacted me, Paul M. Sark, who, as regular readers of this blog know, has a life that is amazingly similar to that of George W. Bush, and is therefore very interested in the whereabouts of gay immigrant terrorists.

This eyewitness account of al-Zarqawi cruising the streets of New York (see Zhiluv's comment in post below) confirms what Me & George W. have always known: that until the Constitution is amended to forever affirm that marriage in America is between one man and one woman, then America will continue to be a haven for gay immigrant terrorists.

As to whether al-Zarqawi and his boyfriend will be getting married in Massachusetts (see my post immediately below), the source was not able to provide any new information. Another well-placed source notes that is conceivable that Al-Zarqawi will put his evil "mastermind" to use as an interior designer among Manhattan's liberal cognoscenti, and may be biding his time waiting for the liberal activist judges in New York to rule in favor of gay marriage.

"Although he was a high-school dropout," said the source, "he has shown himself to a highly effective and determined manager. That's what counts in New York, especially in New York's Silk Stocking district on the Upper East Side. The Park Avenue crowd hates it when designers can't meet deadlines." "One thing for sure," the source concluded, "he'll be a whiz in the demolition stage of apartment renovation."

Me & George W. know this all could have been avoided if only Congress had had the moral courage to support the pro-staight marriage amendment last week. Now we'll have to fight them over here when we all know we were fighting them over there so we wouldn't have to fight them here!

And so, once again the liberals have put American lives in danger. Not only in danger of terrorist attacks, but in danger of gay predators who will stop at nothing to destroy the one-man one-woman tradition of American marriage!

May God continue to bless America and George W. in the face of this perversion of American freedom!

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